I want to digress a little right here and tell a story that I’ve given in talks several times and I actually wrote up and submitted it to a magazine once. They didn’t publish it, but still, it’s part of the New Orleans experience.
New Orleans had (and probably still has) many, many panhandlers on the streets. You could not walk down any street without seeing at least one, sometimes several people begging for money or selling pencils, etc. Since I was dressed in a suit and carried a briefcase, I was a prime target for these people. I learned not to make eye contact. That when they approached me, to look straight ahead and ignore them. I got really good at this in the two years we lived in New Orleans. One day, I was waiting for a light to change and this fellow came up to me and asked if I had any change as he hadn’t eaten in two days. Well, true to form, I ignored him. I kept my eyes ahead and in a few moments, he went on his way to find someone a little more responsive.
For some reason which I can’t explain, except maybe it was the spirit talking to me, I started to think about this guy. I thought about the fact that in my entire life, I had never gone two days without eating. Now, most of these people that are panhandlers are alcoholics and drug takers and won’t use the money for food anyway. That’s what I rationalized. But what if he had been hungry. What if I could have fed him and relieved that hunger. I thought about King Benjamin’s speech in the Book of Mormon about how the beggar should not put his petition to you in vain, for are we not all beggars.
I went home, greatly disturbed and talked to Karen about it. After all, I couldn’t help everyone who asked for my help. I didn’t have enough money to feed half the city of New Orleans. But, maybe I could help one or two now and then. We decided the next time I was approached, I would try to help. Well, it didn’t take long. Probably the next day.
I was standing on a corner and this fellow came up to me and gave me the standard line. I haven’t eaten in two days. Can you give me some change. I stopped and turned and faced him and looked him in the eye. “Are you really hungry?” I asked him. “Yes”, he said. He seemed surprised that I had actually spoken to him. Fine, I told him. I wouldn’t give him any money but I would take him to a diner that was right near by and buy him a meal. Would he like that?
He seemed weary, but agreed. I told him I had to make a quick stop first (I was working, after all), but it would only take a minute and then we could go to the diner. I went into the building to do my business leaving him outside on the street. He didn’t want to follow me in. When I came back, he was gone. Now, I didn’t feel bad about that. He had made the decision to leave. Maybe he thought I was blowing him off and that I would go out the back door and leave him standing there. Or maybe he really wasn’t that hungry. I’ll never know. I did know that I was sincere in my desire to help him and would have done it if he had stayed put for a few minutes. I felt I had done all I could.
There is always a way to help other people. You do not need to help everyone. That would be impossible. But you can help whoever you can help. Following the spirit can go a long way to knowing when to help and when it is a scam.
We left New Orleans shortly after that and moved to Utah. There are not so many panhandlers at BYU as there were in New Orleans, so I don’t get the opportunity to try it very often.
Dad